.: where is the love :.

an extract of versions of 'love is...' from beautiful souls. sadly enough, i couldn't even utter mine. i guess i have metamorphosed myself into someone i barely recognize....

.: slow dancing in a burning room :.

" ...you were the one i tried to draw...you're the only light i ever saw..." -JM

don't you think we should learned somehow? don't you think we should revive the moment? i really think we should...

.: broken wings :.

The little girl travelled up the mountain as Heidi, following her wandering mind.

She got lost in the moment, feeling needy. Will there ever be blessing in disguise?

Afternoon sun shone hot in her face, for there were no trees to offer her shade.

With broken wings she tried to fly high, to find rainbow of happiness in the sky.

She hopes with happiness, there can be a kind of amnesia to sadness.

A long winded path, a little smirk of hope from a downtown.

On top of the world, it’s getting thirsty. She wailed the unheard, the zephyr responded uncanny.

Will she ever witness such beauty again? Will there ever be a happy ending?

She maybe despaired for her future not there, not knowing what was to come.

“Anak sekecil itu berkelahi dengan waktu. Demi satu impian yang kerap ganggu tidurmu…."(by: Iwan Fals)

- inspired by the beauty of Broga Hill -

.: fallen angel :.

Just like an angel, you would normally perceived,
complex life yet simple in her needs…

Being selfless, desire to care for others,
is she strong enough to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders?

You are vulnerable and sensitive,

she would give herself, even when there’s nothing left to give….

She would want to sympathize more than she could even offer,

yet she broke her wings, and falter; does it even matter?

Does she even deserve the hailing of heroes?
When she couldn’t even deal with her own sorrows…

Under the devil’s gaze, her morals gone astray,
fooling herself, this righteous games she plays…

Just like a fallen angel; she is, holding on to her pain,

she used to believe in happiness, now sunshine watered by rain…

.: the waiting game :.

i feel like you’re desensitised..
you took me for granted, you thought i would compromise…

i may be in delusion, but i’m breaking the rules of the game..
frankly my dear, i think this would just be a shame...

tell me; who am i? try looking at me in the eyes...
just a little bit more space, i get it. for you and i...

.: emoticons :.

Sometimes, i just wonder, how is it like if you were going through menopause? Does it make you feel helpless, not in control and always teary eyed? Does it make you feel you are not worth an extra day? Will it be the ticket to hell? How can they hold it together? How can a woman go about daily living though they feel they are in a window showing the nakedness and how nothing is quite right?

This batch of crazy emotions. Roller coaster ride. This fight. You need to overcome.

It’s a pity sometimes when hormonal ordeals are usually left untold.

Have you ever had such rare emotions before; you feel like bawling it out, however held back due to fear of insignificance resulting to nuisance?

Have you ever felt you have locked yourself in a curse; from which you cannot break free from?
Misery and discontent bound to shadow; to the point where your heart can’t speak the words unspoken.

Love lost? Abused? Hopeless? Suicidal? Confused?

Maybe because you have forgotten what it’s like to live.
Maybe it slipped your mind that love finds a path amidst a field of pain.
Life only lives in between these breaths of death.
This fragile moment; need to be forgotten, need to be forgiven.

Find the ray of light, peeking through. As the good side is there, obtainable still.

Find the senses that you can indulge…

Sight – delight your eyes, travel the world, or simply read to explore imaginations
Sound – Feast on the modulation and resonance of the harmonizing tunes that calms you down
Touch – Express yourself. Write. Hold hands. Two beautiful motions that create sensations
Taste – Appetite gratification. Eat, Pray, Love.
Smell – Nurture your olfactory nerves with the fragrance of nature; astounding bliss

Do not forget. Why you are here. Let the crazy emotions laid to rest…

.: blink of an eye :.

it takes the eye to blink or the heart to beat to see why life matters.

who would have known, the hours lost in your moment. is the most precious time of your life.

blink once, blink twice….

the dimming light obnubilates the sight of your loved ones flashed before you,

love unflinchingly, all out and head first,

you know it’s time to let go…

…

cut on her skin, drawing blood, beauty marred by a terrible wrong.

for some reason, she couldn’t bring herself to tear. she knows, it’s for her own good…

in her sleep, she’s dancing as she fights,

numb; she couldn’t feel it, when the knife thrust inside.

she was reaching out for the balloon in the sky. the balloon; her dreams, almost swept away…

waking up to the sound of holler. it hurts, more than anything else; as it was accompanied by the sense of loss and bitterness…

though life leaking out of her, as she vomits the venom; every second passes, with supreme loving care, she felt strangely alive…

barely awake, she pushes herself. just to get a glimpse of pure delight in someone else’s face…

it’s them. who have made it possible. who sat every hour, every minute. praying. bracing against the wind of chance.

…

as days go by…

some were hospitalized and recovered; Clinton for instance.

some were hospitalized and gone forever; Allahyarham Ahmad Sharby—ina lillah, my prayers for the soul R.I.P.

some, simply redha; standing on her toes, leaning forward, and keep on fighting.

Alhamdulillah. you know you can never thank anyone enough.

…

Alhamdulillah. my recently improved health is a credit to your prayers and attentiveness.

Thank you for everything and God bless your kind soul.

.: numb :.

"though i know it didn't exist, the monster i'm afraid the most was often on my mind. it paralyzes me, turning into stones. most of us had a certain something that really scared us. A 'something' we had to defend ourselves against in secret ways..."